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  • Writer's picturekatheryn hyde

Tips for parenting clingy children (velcro kids)

Updated: Jul 29, 2022

Is saying goodbye just too hard? Here are some tips that might help make life easier when parenting a child with separation anxiety.

Are you tired of being a climbing frame or post for your child to cling to or climb?

How can we support our children to feel confident and secure without needing to cling onto us for dear life?


  1. Provide reassurance to your child, let them know that you are always there for them no matter how near or far you are from each other. You are an anchor of support and place of safety for them to return to after their many adventures.

  2. Notice when they are being brave, it doesn't matter how much or how little just notice and then praise your child for being brave and let them know you're proud of them.

  3. Incorporate mindful moments into your day, using your 5 senses, notice 5 things you can see, 4 things you can hear, 3 things you can feel, two things you can smell and 1 thing you can taste. Notice your breathing and focus on something positive.

  4. Let shy or anxious kids know what to expect beforehand. This gives them a greater sense of control when they need it.

  5. Offer children a chance to shine, recognising their strengths and allowing them to express themselves fully without any judgment.

  6. Moderate your anxiety, children can see and feel what's around them so lead them the way.


Books to help with separation anxiety

The invisible string written by Patrice Karst

Owl babies written by Martin Waddells

The kissing hand written by Audrey Penn


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